Kerry Katona strikes again

Only fame leach Kerry Katona could turn something as heartbreaking as Amy Winehouse dying into a possible moment to grab attention.
Kerry's more than happy to constantly let the world know she's had it tough, she battled against all odds and is still here to tell her sorry tale.

However, she's taken the proverbial biscuit this time.
No not a disco biscuit, although she's probably necked that with a bag of Columbian marching powder too.


I bumped into her manager Max Clifford at a party this week who told me: "As soon as Amy died Kerry phoned me up sobbing 'that could have been me'. She was distraught. She knows how lucky she is to turn her life around."

He's a shred business man Max, from the Simon Cowell school of training. Never one to miss a showbiz opportunity.
I'm surprised they didn't dye Kerry's hair black, lob it into a beehive and make get her to do a tribute act.
If she turns up in a magazine shoot  next week styled/ dressed as Amy talking about their similarities and struggles it's going to be a very bleak day in showbiz.

I won't know wether to laugh, cringe or cry.

Doggie Lovin'

I honestly think there's a chance I'll end up one of those batty, old ladies surrounded by dogs and cats.
Hopefully not smelling of piss and searching for stuff in other people's bins.
But surrounded by an unnecessary, probably slightly unhygienic, number of animals.


Molly looking gorgeous


My boyfriend Jimmy didn't really believe me when I told him I'd met a lady over Facebook and was going to look after her dog - Molly. A black cocker spaniel that's so cool, she makes Kate Moss look insignificant.

Anyway to cut a long story short, I met a lovely lady called Anne and fell in love with her dog.
We spent a few weeks chatting over FB, we met for lunch (with the dog of course) to a bar in Clapham and then a few weeks later I spent a whole Saturday with her beloved pooch.

Yep us dog lovers really are that weird.

I was telling this story to my best mate Sam and she just looked at me totally confused.
She didn't actually say anything or make any sarcastic comments, she just went quiet and looked confused.

In retrospect, I agree it is actually quite strange to meet someone over the internet and then travel from north to south London (18 stops on the Northern line) to babysit their dog.
But that's just the way of the fur lovers.
I didn't think it was very weird, but people like Sam and my mum can't really comprehend it.

Anyway we took Molly for a three hour walk across Clapham Common and then for a bit of a knees up in a boozer in Clapham Old Town. OK, that was a bit of a lie, dinner and a few pints.



Me and Molly


 

Jimmy and Molly



Another Day In The Office

If you have a Twitter account you'll know it's just one big bragging playground.
In the form off..."Hey look at these free amazing, expensive shoes I've just been sent? Did I mention they were free? Amazing? And expensive?"
to..."I was out at the best party in London last night, with the best celebrities, who are, like, my best friends now."
and..."I've just told the funniest joke to everyone and now I'm so popular and hilarious. I wish I could be my friend." Etc etc...
So I'd like to take this opportunity to show the "amazing" things we get sent into GOSS.
Yep, you're going to be jealous of our super expensive, cutting edge, highly desired freebies.
Prepare yourself...

Goss reporter Ed Dyson and Justin Beiber, ahem....

A magazine, blow up guitar and microphone, ridiculous sunglasses and a cutout Justin Beiber face.

 *I can't lie I posted this picture on Twitter, I think 0.00001% of my Twitter "friends" were jealous.

Sorry, I can't help it.
We're just so lucky on Goss and I felt compelled to boast.

Sob.

The Wanted - peeing on a hamster

Had a really busy week last week.
Started off by intervieing The Wanted.
The lads are joining the London 2012 Olympic Torch Replay team... exciting stuff.
So not only did I get to chat to the five lads I also go to hold the Olympic torch....whoop.

The Wanted, me and the Olympic torch

They might look like five naive and innocent boy banders but they revealed they often get so wasted they don't know what they're doing.
Max told me he recently weed on a hamster when he was hammered saying: "I was at a party and the lights were broken. I was feeling around in this room and I'm half-blind anyway.
"I started having a wee and suddenly thought: 'That doesn't sound like a toilet', so I pinched it, opened the door to let some light in and saw it was a hamster's cage. To be fair I did clean out all the sawdust. No, I didn't clean the hamster. It was soggy.
"My nan was so disgusted last week when she read that I wet the bed when I was drunk.
"Now she's going to hear I pissed on a hamster. Great."

Jay chipped in: "Me and Nathan were sharing a hotel room in Burnley, apparently I came in blind drunk, unzipped my rucksack, which had all my clothes in, and just took a piss in it."


The lads also admitted they wante to go to V festival in fancy dress saying: "We were thinking we might wear ski masks so we can go out into the crowd and muck about. We might go raving in a burka.
If you see a group of people at the stand-up urinals in a burka, you'll know it's us. That would be hilarious."

They also admitted the hate The Only Way Is Essex as they're a bunch of chavvy orange clones.
The said they'd never date any of the cast in a million years saying they're "too good for them."

Ghost The Musical - crying

I shoud have also said we went to the celebrity gala night of Ghost The Musical.
So we were sitting by JLS' Aston, JB and Marvin - who was there with his Saturday's girlfriend Rochelle.
Other celebs included Denise Van Outen, Lorraine Kelly (and her really pretty daughter), Jennifer Ellison, McFly, Kimberly Walsh, Joe McElderry, Arlene Phillips.

So it was a good turn out.

Anyway, we (me and sonja) could hear someone sobbing behind us in our seats. Sonja was crying quite a bit, but she wasn't sobbing out loud and sniveling. We turned around to see who it was and it was Rochelle.
She had tears pouring down her face.
At the end we were going to speak to Rochelle to see if she enjoyed the show, but she'd done a legger with JLS in tow.
Apparently she cried so much she had to leave.
She even later tweeted: “Ghost is an amazing show! Just been to the launch you NEED to go! No question!! I cried loudly too #nothingworse.”

Her mate Aston replied: “Pure loud. If you watch with Roch then take EARPLUGS and a towel, Ha."

See our story in the Daily Star on Ghost here....

http://www.dailystar.co.uk/posts/view/202142/Rochelle-Wiseman-s-ghost-tears/Rochelle-Wiseman-s-ghost-tears

Ghost The Musical - a review

When my friend Sonja invited me to go to see Ghost The Musical I thought it would be a load of cheesy nonsense.
I love going to the theatre, and I like a good musical. But the early 90s film Ghost staring Patrick Swayze, Demi Moore and Whoppi Goldberg was a romantic fantasy...pure fromage. And based on the word "ditto".

It's far to say I wasn't expecting much. Apart from a few tears at the end when he (Sam) finally went off to heaven.
However, it was brilliant, I seriously recommend it.
Nothing like the superficial American drivel I expected.
It's fast paced, intense, dramatic, edgy, gritty... I was completely absorbed within the first 10 minutes.
Set in New York so it has a really fresh, contemporary vibe with the cast body popping like street dancers. The psychedelic lighting was really sharp and dramatic. The menacing subway ghost in the infamous underground train scene was fantastic. A black guy with huge grey/white dreadlocks who rapped, ranted and snarled through his singing parts.

The show is full of smoke and mirrors - the special effects make it stand out against any other musical I've seen for years.
Cast members impressively jump in and out of dead bodies and throw people up, down and through walls. Very clever.

Yes it has the cheesy pottery wheel scene but it also has sexy business men and woman zooming around on conveyor belts dancing to the beat of green strobe psychedelic lights.
And psychic Oda Mae Brown is hilarious. Flirty, flithy and fun.

This musical makes others look drab and old hat.
I'm sure there are many middle-age art critics who've panned Ghost The Musical but that's because they're stuck in the past and don't appreciate a modern take on culture.
And the dramatic, atmospheric music is probably too loud for them.

Fashion faux pas

I can quite honestly say I've never turned up to meet anyone wearing exactly the same clothes.

Not just a top or dress that's a simular style or colour.
I mean exactly the same clothes.

I met my fellow showbiz journo friend Halina Watts for some lunch and had this horrendous fashion faux pas.

If we'd been Paris Hilton we could have demanded the chauffeur turn around so we could get changed.
But as we're skint, not famous, showbiz hacks we had to grin and bare it.

Gutted.

Although remotely amusing.




 

Rustic Camping - my favourite hobbie

Everyone seems to want to go Glamping these days. ‘Campers’ taking along their duck-down duvets, feather pillows, fur throws, floor length mirrors etc.

Some of my mates, the ones with a bit of dosh, now camp in posh tipis complete with double bed, fridge and candle chandeliers.

However, I organised a simplistic camping trip.

I was expecting no frills, but I wasn't expecting our campsite to resemble something out of a horror movie. With a shower that makes you feel more dirty once you've used it.

Apparently that’s the price you have to pay if you want a fire next to your tent?




Forget glamourous tipis we're going basic. My friend Craig and his
very excited chidlren Izzy and Henry

 The boys got far too excited at the prospect of being able to throw raw meat on a huge blazing fire which they’d crafted themselves. And we only paid £7 each per night.

Not many camp sites allow roaring log fires, maybe we should have questioned why this one did??

Anyway...we turned up about 30 miles south of Oxfordshire and literally came face-to- face with an empty field, four porta toilets and endless grass surrounded by electric fencing. That was it.

We had a walk around.

Stumbled across a herd of cows and some chickens but nothing else.

We eventually located one solitary shower, surrounded by an army of insects and spiders.

It's good job no one planned to wash their hair all weekend.

My boyfriend Jimmy and me drunk round
the camp fire

The most amazing thing about our rustic, bohemian, no frills campsite was the sea of stars, literally thousands of them, lighting up the sky each night.

Because we were surrounded by nothing but meadows, hills and cattle fields the starlit sky was amazing.

My friend Tammy had a star gazing app on her iPhone called Star Map. It was awesome for us amateur astronomers. The program shows everything in the sky from planets, star charts, galaxies etc. Lets be honest, the only two everyone knows are Orion’s Belt (three stars in a diagonal line) and The Plough (seven stars shaped like a saucepan).

But who needs modern technology when you've red wine to pickle your senses?

One night, mid drunken stupor, I pointed out that the top of a tree, which was glowing in the moonlight, looked like an angry fox. We all started laughing and staring at it. I didn't even know that it was possible to hallucinate of red wine…even two boxes of it. It seems we'd reached a new booze high. Or low depending on how you look at it.

This is what we romanticised about

We'd hoped to let off Chinese lanterns. They're pretty cool and we planned to each write our names on them and release them into the sky. Yep, we envisioned some kind of fairy tale moment. But we had a complete disaster trying to set them off.

We were too drunk, stumbling around like loons, trying to light each side. By the time one side was alight the other had blown out and this continued for about 10 minutes flipping from side to side.

Eventually we sacked it off, panicking that we'd let them off and they’d come crashing down and set one of our tents on fire.

So much for the serene, romantic moment we were all expecting.

Despite the fact it rained for most of the weekend we had a great time. It stopped raining long enough for us to play rounders. The girls beat the boys. Oh yeah!

We even managed to refrain from gorging on sausages and burgers to make a king prawn and white wine risotto on our camping stove.

We baked garlic bread (wrapped in foil) in the fire and made a mozzarella and tomato salad. And a jug of Pimms.

Yeah... I know. We were quite impressed too. Who said this camping lark had to include the bog standard pot noodle?

Despite giggling in a field, drinking cheap red wine out of boxes and toasting marshmallows on an open fire the best bit about camping is going to sleep.

I love that first moment when you zip-up your tent, get in your sleeping bag and suddenly realise you’re sleeping five meters away from a bunch of strangers (other people in the field, not my friends).

You’re all high on life - sleeping on a bed of grass. In a dark field, in the middle of nowhere.

After the chorus of ‘good night John Boy’, ‘good night Jim Bob’, ‘good night Mary Ellen’... you suddenly tune into the random man snoring his face off a few tents away.

Although it's kind of annoying, it suddenly blends into the background of the excitement of sleeping in a tent surrounded by your best friends.

I truly love camping.

It baffles me when people say they hate it.

Give me a group of friends, in a nylon coloured dome over a 5 star spa any day.



Jimmy, Me, Tim, Sam, Tammy and Craig

JLS at M&M World

Sometimes I forget that men do seriously only think of one thing.They do.

I'm not a raving feminist or a man basher, in fact I think men are great I have stacks of awesome male friends, but it's true. And time and time again I'm reminded of this fact.

Whether it's men staring scarily at you on the tube, men perving at your ass as they politely (yeah sure) let you out the door first or just men sending you random, unnecessary flirty emails at work...that one confuses me? Why bother?

Anyway, men are born to cop an eyeful at every opportunity and flirt outrageously.

Peter Andre should 100% win an award or even an OBE for his contribution.

Pete can turn any conversation into sex and will give you more compliments in five minutes than there is time to utter said words.He's off the flirting Ricktar scale.

It's not personal, I've observed\ seen\ heard him do it to EVERY girl he’s around. He’s probably like it with his own mother. Which in turn doesn't really make any girl feel special and in that respect I have an smidgen of sympathy for Katie Price.

The second biggest candidates are JLS. Step forward Marvin and Aston.

I went to interview them for the opening of M&M world in Leicester Square - Boris Jonson was cutting the illusive ribbon but the lads were performing.

We only had five minutes to interview them and at least four of those minutes included them flirting outrageously. They can't help it. They're always on a full-on charm offensive. Well, at least that's one way to stop people writing bad things about you.



Chatting to the JLS backstage in their dressing room



The M&M lab where the chocolate is mixed

Check out the interview here where the lads embarrassingly admit Craig David drank them under the table..

Goss interview with JLS 

Peter Andre on the Tequila slammers

When Peter Andre's management contacted me to ask if we'd like to do an interview on surrounding his new single Perfect Night, it was unlikely I'd say no.

They suggested we interviewed him in the office...I suggested we all had a night on lash...recreating his (or as the case might be, my) perfect night.

See what we did there? Yep, not very creative.

Anyway, he agreed.

So Goss - me and Sonja - took Pete out for the night. Meal, drinks, more drinks, silly conversations, more drinks and a set of story board photos.

We all got dress up ready for our date.

Pete in a crisp black suit with waist coat, me and Sonja in matching red outfits (that was not deliberate but worked out quite well for the photos).

We had dinner at the Pestana hotel on the Chelsea Bridge.

Pete convinced me to try the Tricolore salad - he said it reminded him of home. Not sure why as he's from Greece and it's a Italian dish. Anyway, Tricolore salad, designed from the three stripe Italian Tricolore flag .

Avocado, mozzarella and tomato.

We then had a variety of fillet steak, sea bass and a vintage bottle of red wine.

Luckily for us Pete was paying.

We chatted about everything over dinner.

- his obsession with UFOs, how he's seen then, photographed then and even sent emails to fellow enthusiast Robbie Williams about his alien passion

- he talked a lot about sex...do women fake it, and why? Pete can turn anything normal into a sexual euphemism... even when we first arrived looking at the menu he asked: "Do you want the ham HOCK? Do you like HOCK? Do you need HOCK?"

- why he doesn't have sex with groupies anymore (he's been there got the t-shirt many times)

- why he thinks Cheryl Cole did the right thing getting back with Ashley

- how he and Katie Price no longer talk

- his perfect date would be camping on a beach in Australia, playing Extreme - More Than Words on the guitar around a campfire, getting drunk on red wine and waking up naked.

- he wishes he could move back to Oz, but would never ever leave his children here

- how his dad thinks marriage is really hard and something you have to continually work at

- he naturally has really curly hair but employs his brother to straight it daily

- he doesn't like to go clubbing anymore but is going out to Ibiza and to see his brother DJ in Sugar Hut in    Essex

After dinner we convinced Mr A to do a Tequila slammer. And then in a drunken moment he forked out for a bottle of Laurent Perrier Rose champagne for us. Pretty expensive in London bars.

Not sure about Pete but this turned out to be a rather Perfect Night for Goss.

Wireless Day Two

Saturday night at Wireless was headlined by The Chemical Brothers.

The biggest D lister hanging around was Dean Gaffney, he'd somehow managed to sneak into one of the VIP tents and was knocking back champagne. How does he still do it?

Other celebs included Alexa Chung, Tulisa from X Factor/ NDubz and Sarah Harding

Sarah Harding bizarrely decided to give her Girls Aloud bandmate Cheryl Cole's much hyped 28th bday bash a miss. This was quite surprising as Kimberley Walsh and Nicola Roberts went along to show support.

We all know Sarah's never turned down the chance to booze and party in her life, so why the snub? On such an important night in the showbiz world?

Sarah told me she was "too busy recording in the studio."

Sorry Harding I don't believe you for a second, surely you could pop out for an hour, one drink, show your face, just to say hello? I think her actions speak loudly....there's not going to be a Girls Aloud reunion anytime soon.

Tulisa told us she was petrified the X factor fans are going to "hate" her and think she's a "chav" with no talent. Read the full article in GOSS here....http://www.dailystar.co.uk/goss/view/199381/Tulisa-Contostavlos-I-m-all-front/

The highlight of the day for me was watching The Streets. Mike Skinner put on an awesome show, giving out some quality banter and even stripping off after the crowd egged him on. The Brummie rapper is retiring now and this was his last gig - gutted. Always been a big fan.

Anyway Mike wasn't mopping around after his performance, he told me: "I'm going to get off my pickle and dance to The Chemical Brothers in the main crowd. I'll be mashed so if you see me, don't make eye contact, just leave me in my circle of madness."

Forget Danny Dyer, Mr Skinner is my new chav crush, he was looking pretty buff...and I'm a stickler for a man with some chat.

Mike Skinner singing Dry Your Eyes Mate

"You're Fit, You're Fit, But Don't You Know It"

Wireless

It’s the first weekend in July, the sun’s out and Hyde Park is buzzing.

This can only mean one thing... Wireless festival.

The Barclaycard VIP area was awash with celebrities including The Sugababes, Prince Harry, Elen Rivas and Alexandra Burke all eating mini burgers, mini fish ‘n chips and knocking back vodka and red bull.

We were given pink bands to go to the exclusive front of stage raised VIP area to watch The Black Eyed Peas, who were headlining Friday night.

Prince Harry and a massive group of his lad mates were raving to BEP’s. 

One thing is for certain Harry is never going win any kudos for his dress sense. My dad has more style, and that’s saying something.

Royal rocker Harry was dancing in front of me with his baggy stone washed jeans, green fishing jacket and a sports cap.

One of Hazza’s friends told me he had his wisdom teeth removed earlier in the day saying: “He’s got a really puffy face from the op. He’s hiding his swollen face under a cap.” 

Moments later Harry picked up a blonde toddler and plonked her on his shoulders as Will.i.am et al did their thang on stage.

Vanessa Feltz was snubbed from the Barclaycard VIP tent by door staff who said she “wasn’t famous enough”. Ouch.

Huey from the Fun Loving Criminals was chilling inside telling us: “I’m on my best behaviour, there’s a £30,000 glass snooker table over there, I can see it getting messy in here later and that getting smashed, not the most sensible thing to have at a festival, with drunk menaces around.” 

In other news the roller skates who dance around outside Hyde Park are amazing, we saw one guy shimmying through a row of plastic cones on one foot, on just one wheel

We also saw a 30ish year old girl getting a bollocking from Wireless security for pulling her pants down in the middle of the park and doing a wee.

The security was shouting at her, telling her to “stand up” and “walk on” while she was squatting, bare bummed shouting, “I can’t I’m mid wee”. Niiiice.

Apart from that it was pretty low key, we all got smashed on beer and vodka, danced like mentalists to the BEP's who were doing a medley of old skool 90s tune and missed the last tube home.


Huey playing on the £30,000 glass snooker table



Me and my fella Jimmy chilling in the Barclaycard area



The crowd waiting for the Black Eyed Peas to come on

Kate Moss is now Kate Hince

So Kate Moss got married over the weekend.
She is now the official missus of The Kills rocker Jamie Hince.

However rewind six years to 27th June 2005.
Kate Moss sealed her engagement to potty rock star Pete Doherty with a joke wedding at Glastonbury.
The archetypical rock 'n roll couple checked into the Chapel of Love and Loating in Lost Vagueness for a wedding/ blessing.

Two years later on 1st January 2007 Mossy and Doherty got married again in Thailand. They exchanged vows on New Year's Day in a Buddhist ceremony at a villa overlooking the Phuket beach.

However, Pete cheated on Kate with a hot South African model (seriously who cheats on Kate Moss?) and  then couldn't stop having an affair with his beloved heroin so the couple split up, Pete wrote a song for her (Bohemian Love) to try and win her back.

It didn't work, two months later she got together with Jamie Hince. And the rest is history.

To celebrate Kate getting married we dedicate the whole of the showbiz page GOSS to her wedding.
Well she is our favourite British party caner after all.

Kate looked like the perfect bohemion bride - a floaty dress designed by her friend John Galliano, loose waves in her hair and 14 flower girls.
Kate and Jamie tied the knot in Gloustershire and celebrated with a three day festival nicknamed Mossstock and Mosstonbury.


The Goss column in the Daily Star to celebrates Mossy three day wedding




Jamie, Kate and daughter Lila on the big day

 

Kate and Pete moments before they had their
spiritual 'wedding' at Glasto